What I Learned from #TOPcrime2012

Like the swallows returning to Capistrano, the returning writers are welcomed warmly by the folks of Harrogate (Perhaps more warmly: swallows don’t carry credit cards).

 After the panels are done, the bar takes in more in an hour than they do during the entire day of a wedding (Writing is thirsty work).

 There is a big hill in Harrogate but most of the good things are at the bottom of it (Gravity is your friend).

 You can eat yourself into a food coma at many restaurants in Harrogate (Luigi treats you right).

 Zoe Sharp dresses too chic to be a writer (Odds favour ‘future Bond villain’ at present).

 Never kid Allan Guthrie about the Rangers (No #jellyandicecream)


Sarah Pinborough is up to something (No one is quite certain what, but looks on in anticipation).

The Travelodge sits over a night club (Bring earplugs).

The Crown has paper thin walls (bring earplugs or a stenographer if you’re next to a public figure).

The Hale Bar, oldest pub in Harrogate, has an old Remington typewriter (if you get really desperate when the laptop crashes).

The Wetherspoons pub has free WiFi (if you get really desperate for sober conversation).

If you wear a hat, everyone is going to want to try it on (Inevitable).

Getting through the scrum around the bar on Saturday night requires the skills of a good rugby player (Bring a couple with you next time; they can also carry your luggage after you’ve been through the book room).

People seldom look like their twitter avatars (Which does not help you find them in a dark and crowded bar).

If you do not go, you will envy those who did (Just go).

~ K. A. Laity



  1. Very interestingly funny,but true. I live in York so we must get together sometime.

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